Last week’s paragraphs were a mixed bag: some better than others. The major problems are not (in most cases) grammar or spelling related. They are, instead, related to communicating clearly your thoughts on a complex piece of work and on your overall comprehension. Some students got bogged down in the “correct” answers (no doubt influenced by my teaching and secondary sources). Others showed more original thinking. To do well, do your own thinking.
Some of you are giving a “signal” before quoting the text and then going on to explain the significance of your quote. If you are, congratulations! I expect a ratio of at least 2 to 1 of original content to quote. Thus, if you quote 20 words, your signal (introduction to) and explanation (after the quote is used) ought to be 40 words or so.
Overquoting makes it harder to pick out your thoughts from those of the writing to which you refer. I also encourage those of you who paraphrase well, especially for factual matters that are not important to quote. Beware the tendency to tell me what a quote says and then hitting me with a quote that says the exact same thing! I’m much more interested in why you’ve chosen it, actually.
Another area students could improve on is reading the question carefully. When I asked about a character and then specified that you look at “two actions” and what each one shows, some of you responded only to the beginning of the question, thus avoiding the requirements!
This week, we’ll be looking closely at our current story, using a specific way of reading a text: writing annotations. We will also be working in groups to compare our annotated versions.
I’ll be giving out some resources for writing good comparison/contrast paragraphs as Friday’s class will be more challenging than usual: writing paragraphs that compare and contrast stories we've studied.
After the break on Friday, I will give you a media-based assignment and resources to help you complete it. Your work will be posted to the blog. Since the American election will occur between our Friday and Wednesday classes, the media will be abuzz with information that we can discuss on November 5. It should be interesting!
To see an easy-to-follow example, check in the comments section below. It's on a story you may not have read, but can be read by any reader (as should your work!).
5 comments:
Dorothy Canfield Fisher’s use of metaphor, specifically simile, is effective throughout the story, “The Heyday of the Blood.” Granther, when adding up his fair money, “[sticks] out his tongue like a schoolboy doing a sum,” thus giving us a charming picture, one that emphasizes his youthfulness, too. When Granther wins his one dollar bet, he was “screaming like a steam-calliope with exultation.” A calliope uses steam to play metal pipes, surely a high-pitched sound that matches an old man’s cheering. Near the end of the story, Jo Mallory, afraid his Granther might be dying, “felt a chill like cold water at the roots of [his] hair,” a pretty accurate description of dread. Fisher’s masterful use of simile is one of the delights to be found in her story, “The Heyday of the Blood.”—135 words
hi, brad... thanks for the marks u gave me...^^* can i ask u a question about writing annotations?? isn't it same as writing analysis because the way i heard it in the class earlier, it sounds the same, or is it just my thought?? And,on friday's class, there'll be another in-class write, right??just make sure...^^*
Esther: Any annotation would also qualify as analysis, but not when it is used to identify vocabulary words etc. Yes, we will have an in-class write on Friday for the first 1/2 of the class.
thanks for the comment, brad...^^* can i ask u about the in-class write on friday?? do we have to follow ur example that displayed on the comment section, or are we allowed to use another format, by another format means block or point by point because i personally prefer the block format...^^*
You can choose the style you prefer, Esther.
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